Poet Writer Albany NY
…if you are bothered by the idea of this being real, you are invited to do what the author should have done, and what authors and readers have been doing since the beginning of time:
PRETEND IT’S FICTION.
~ A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius, [Acknowledgments section], by Dave Eggers
“It has always seemed strange to me…The things we admire in men, kindness and generosity, openness, honesty, understanding and feeling, are the concomitants of failure in our system. And those traits we detest, sharpness, greed, acquisitiveness, meanness, egotism and self-interest, are the traits of success. And while men admire the quality of the first they love the produce of the second.”
~ John Steinbeck
“Let us toast to animal pleasures, to escapism, to rain on the roof and instant coffee, to unemployment insurance and library cards, to absinthe and good-hearted landlords, to music and warm bodies and contraceptives… and to the “good life”, whatever it is and wherever it happens to be.”
~ Hunter S. Thompson
Follow inspiration, not popularity.
Write from the soul, not for the world.
~ R.M. Engelhardt
Among saints & sinners,
Good & evil
God & Satan
Nothing matters.
Among books filled with
Words, conformed and
Pressed into a small child’s
Mind
Nothing matters.
Among the shadows,
Self-esteem cut down by
Authority and the egos of
Those who have murdered and
Buried their dreams
Nothing matters.
Among the opinions & speculations,
Expectations ten long years after
Who is the failure and what
Is contentment
Nothing matters.
Among the critics and
The sad petty levelers
The damned & the damning
Nothing matters.
Among the forgotten,
The wild actions of a
Once uncaring, unconscious youth
Nothing matters.
Among the depressed, the once
Suicidal who couldn’t
Find his place in reality’s schemes
Nothing matters.
Among the conquests,
Among the losses & unreal lovers,
The young women made love to and the
False makeup queens soul-fucking in the
Aftermath of ruins & chaos and the
Human heart
Nothing matters.
And among the love given and
Taken, created & destroyed,
Possessed and disowned
Nothing matters.
For these words … are my religion,
This voice … is my church,
This poetry … is my existence
And nothing else matters.
We were hanging out drinking a few shots with
that asshole Metastopholies.
He (as usual) was trying to boug a few drinks, and (as
usual) we..ignored him. At work as usual it was one
long fucking day. I was stuck putting up the sequoias
and disagreed; God liked red, I..liked black. And
somehow the boss (I won’t use her real name) told us
that our work was getting “sloppy’. Too many species,
she said, too many ferns, something like that. You are
always spending way too much time arguing and I’ll
have to let one of you go, the temporal mental bitch
said. “Fine!” I said, “I quit!” Buddha, Muhammad and a
few others were already gone and had decided to start
their own companies. And me, well I was just tired of
all of the insipid & corporate shit where the motto
was “Heaven… we care”. And this action left God whom I
always thought to be a pretty decent kid in general,
to run the factory. And for awhile we kept in touch.
“How’s it goin?” I’d ask and he’d say “Great, but I’m
really busy” “We’ll get together for a beer sometime,
ok?” Ok. But more & more the silence increased. Never
a reply back, never a how are you and never a word through the
psychic dimensional thought. Eventually I found out
that God had taken over and that he had been bumped
up. It figures…I thought. He always was more of the
corporate type than me.
Its been awhile now and I haven’t heard from him in a
few eons. I heard that he never really recovered from
that incident with his kid. Stay away from beautiful
women, we told him, stop trying to be a hero. But he,
never listened and almost…lost everything. Recently I
transformed myself into a man and I caught a glimpse
of him in a bar in NY City. Timothy McVey had just
blown up the federal building with children in it and
God was sitting drunk on a bar stool drinking red
wine. He was really fucked up and he had aged
something awful. “Bartender! Give me another fucking
glass!” he said. They kicked him out and he
disappeared stumbling into the night. I was saddened.
The firm is going under and he’s losing control, other
power hungry kids are creating technology & spirit
advances. God’s becoming an antique, but I know he
won’t retire. Me, well don’t worry about me. I’ll be
fine. These days I’m living as a cat owned by a girl
going thru a tough time. I know where I’m needed. And
even though no one remembers all of the work that I’ve
done its alright. The cycles of the universe go on
because love, redemption and faith never stop and
never die.
Oh and by the way, do you like coffee? Good…that was
MY idea!
Sunday. The rain falling and the quiet solitude rushing in. Seems like a good day to not ponder many of life’s meaningless questions but simply to relax, light up a cigarette and to continue dreaming … dreaming … dreaming
~ R.M. ENGELHARDT
“Once in a while there is a man who won’t do what is demanded of him, and do you know what happens? The whole machine devotes itself coldly to the destruction of his difference. They’ll beat your spirit and your nerves, your body and your mind, with iron rods until the dangerous difference goes out of you.”
~ John Steinbeck
“If you want to write, write it. That’s the first rule. And send it in, and send it in to someone who can publish it or get it published. Don’t send it to me. Don’t show it to your spouse, or your significant other, or your parents, or somebody.
They’re not going to publish it.”
~ Robert B. Parker
R.M. ENGELHARDT 