1} Place two coins (one over each eye) before you start your journey to give to the ferryman.
Your all seeing God may be waiting but just like an amusement park or a Disney film, it’s gonna cost you.
*Cancel that. Apparently they no longer accept coins and have now jimmied the price up to two hundred dollars due to inflation.
*Note 1 To The Unacknowledged: The ferryman hates the band “Styx”. So please DO NOT FUCKING sing!
2} Always carry a ham sandwich or a cream cheese bagel on your person at all times. The Ferryman can be bribed.
3} Poets ARE NOT allowed on the boat. However, if you are a critic that’s acceptable as long as you kiss ass well.
4} Hellfire. Brimstone. Satan? Perhaps you have taken the wrong turn. If this happens or this where your journey ends, then try smiling a lot and suggest a lot of your friends.
*Note 2: Hell is full of lawyers and politicians so suggest somebody else other than like your next door neighbor or an ex.
Keep your hands in the boat at all times!!!! You don’t know where that water’s been.
Bring a translation book, they all speak fuckin’ Egyptian.
*Note 3: If you are a drunk female when you pass or a gay guy DO NOT under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES lift the Ferryman’s loin cloth or robe! And DO NOT make “Boner” jokes!
And yes. Smoking IS allowed…after all well, you’re dead.
Have A Nice Afterlife !
_____________________
~ R.M. ENGELHARDT

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Published by R.M. ENGELHARDT POET AUTHOR WRITER
R.M. Engelhardt is a poet, writer and author who over the last two decades has published over 16 books of poetry including "Nod" "Logos" "Alchemy" & "The Last Cigarette: The Collected Poems of R.M. Engelhardt. The founder of the Upstate NY organization Albany Poets & the Annual Poetry Celebration The Albany Word Fest he has through his ideas & visions helped to contribute a large amount of advocacy and creativity to the Spoken Word~Poetry Capital District scene and is the former host of the long running readings Vox, Propaganda, Listen & currently is creating a new resurrection of one of the area's most well known open mics for poetry and spoken word THE SCHOOL OF NIGHT in Troy, NY held on the last Wednesday evening of each month at the incredible nightclub/speak easy bar THE BERLIN IN TROY NY. His writing has also been published by many journals such as The Rye Whiskey Review, Red Fez, Rusty Truck, Sure! The Charles Bukowski Newsletter, Thunder Sandwich, The Hobo Camp Review, Full of Crow, on the Outlaw Poetry Network & in many many others.
Look for his books "WHERE THE PEOPLE'S VISION PERISHES 2020" "DARK LANDS (2019 on LuLu, Amazon & At Barnes and Noble) The Resurrection Waltz, 2012 ( Infinity Press) & "COFFEE ASS BLUES & OTHER POEMS" ( 2018 Alien Buddha Press 2018) " DarkLands" 2019 & "Where There Is No Vision" 2020 and his new books, "WE RISE LIKE SMOKE" (2021) & Of Spirit, Ash & Bone (2022) all available on Amazon.com
He is also the Editor of the small independent poetry press DeadMansPressInk.
www.gentlemanoutsider.com
*All Poems, Writings & Information Contained On This Blog Are The Property & Owned By The Author R.M. Engelhardt. © 2021
www.rmengelhardt.com
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