ONE CIGARETTE
“It’s cold out here
I’m freezin’ ta death!”
An old man
Says teeth chattering
In his skull
I walk past
All the bars the
Hipsters the vagrants
Past the bright lights
Of clubs & stores
That offer no refuge
From the below zero
Glare of street lamps
And cars
But there
She stands freezing
Shaking uncontrollably
On the corner
In a short dress
& a thin puffy coat
Trying to look tough
When she can’t be more
Than 17
“Hey mister !”
“You got a cigarette?”
I turn to look
Across the street
“I’ll suck your cock for twenty dollars”
And in a moment
That seems like an eternity
I stare. It’s that feeling that
Comes over you when it
Seems like everything
Is unreal
But then
It hits me
Not disgust
But a nausea
A sadness that suddenly
Wells up into my gut
My soul and my heart
Broken into 100,000 pieces
In less than 30 seconds
I shake my head …
“No.”
I don’t have a cigarette for you
Go home.
Your Mom & Dad
Are probably dying
Right now without you
Go find a warm shelter and
Get off this street now or I’ll
Have to call the police
“Fuck You !”
She replies
And again
That nauseous feeling
Returns
And sadly
And calmly
I reply back
Not even one
Cigarette or a $20 dollar bill is going to
Save your sorry ass
And if you haven’t already
Noticed God isn’t saving you
Or watching over you
Either
So
You only have
2 choices
You can freeze
To Death or you can save
Yourself
And that’s
The only gift
There is
Living.
And I don’t care
“Merry Christmas”
And I
Walked off into
The cold & the snow
Knowing nothing
More for her
Could ever be done
~ R.M.2018
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Published by R.M. ENGELHARDT POET AUTHOR WRITER
R.M. Engelhardt is a poet, writer and author who over the last two decades has published over 16 books of poetry including "Nod" "Logos" "Alchemy" & "The Last Cigarette: The Collected Poems of R.M. Engelhardt. The founder of the Upstate NY organization Albany Poets & the Annual Poetry Celebration The Albany Word Fest he has through his ideas & visions helped to contribute a large amount of advocacy and creativity to the Spoken Word~Poetry Capital District scene and is the former host of the long running readings Vox, Propaganda, Listen & currently is creating a new resurrection of one of the area's most well known open mics for poetry and spoken word THE SCHOOL OF NIGHT in Troy, NY held on the last Wednesday evening of each month at the incredible nightclub/speak easy bar THE BERLIN IN TROY NY. His writing has also been published by many journals such as The Rye Whiskey Review, Red Fez, Rusty Truck, Sure! The Charles Bukowski Newsletter, Thunder Sandwich, The Hobo Camp Review, Full of Crow, on the Outlaw Poetry Network & in many many others.
Look for his books "WHERE THE PEOPLE'S VISION PERISHES 2020" "DARK LANDS (2019 on LuLu, Amazon & At Barnes and Noble) The Resurrection Waltz, 2012 ( Infinity Press) & "COFFEE ASS BLUES & OTHER POEMS" ( 2018 Alien Buddha Press 2018) " DarkLands" 2019 & "Where There Is No Vision" 2020 and his new books, "WE RISE LIKE SMOKE" (2021) & Of Spirit, Ash & Bone (2022) all available on Amazon.com
He is also the Editor of the small independent poetry press DeadMansPressInk.
www.gentlemanoutsider.com
*All Poems, Writings & Information Contained On This Blog Are The Property & Owned By The Author R.M. Engelhardt. © 2021
www.rmengelhardt.com
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R.M. ENGELHARDT 